How To Achieve Uncompromised Performance with Angeline Yee

How To Achieve Uncompromised Performance with Angeline Yee

I am excited about our guest, Angeline Yee. She is Chinese, but grew up in Malaysia. She is known as Chinese-Malaysian. Angeline is a coach, a therapist and a speaker. She traveled to London UK to speak about poor mindset that is affecting the global performance, she has worked with corporates, employees, TV personalities, movie producers, models, athletes, CEOs to help them get the greatest strength by uncompromised performance.

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Welcome, Angeline. Tell us what is it like to grow up in Malaysia?

Growing up in Malaysia simply means that you have limited opportunities when you are Chinese. The population in Malaysia is about 75% Malaysians. We, Chinese-Malaysians, really have to grab our opportunities. We have limited seats in the local government universities. Many times, the local community here really have to strive hard and be their best to be able to go and enroll themselves in the universities or even in the government projects and business deals that is entirely given and entitled to the Malays. Rather than it be open business deals or opportunities, which doesn’t quite happen this way. Even in the schools, they give them away for the Malays most of the time. It’s not so much on the Chinese, even though it is a national school by right you should have equal opportunities and be enrolled according to the merits, but this is not the case. They set aside maybe 80%, 85% for the Malays, while the rest of the community really have to struggle and compete to get into the balance of the 15% that we have.

That is really an unfair treatment.

Since growing up in this country, we do not question. I believe that is something which has already been there for so many years and there is no requirement to stir up any racial or cultural imbalances or unfair treatments. Rather, we look at it from the positive perspective that when we compete, when we make ourselves stronger, when we perform better so that we can be in that pool, we made ourselves greater. The Chinese community becomes greater as a whole. It doesn’t matter whether it is in Malaysia or we go outside of Malaysia, we are equally more competitive. We are equally stronger in that sense because we have huddled through the struggles in our country.

I heard that the majority of people in Malaysia follow Muslim religion. Are you familiar with that religion and their ritual and practice?

Most of the population here are Malays. The Malays here are practiced Muslims. They pray five times a day. Most of the people, whether it is Christian or Buddhist, we have our freedom to practice our own religion as well. You will find Mosques everywhere, where it is a prayer place. They do have their prayer time that may affect the vicinity around them because it’s a little loud in the morning. Some people may find it a little annoying or disturbing, but the Malaysians have gotten used to this environment. As long as we get our fair chance to practice our own religion, that is not much of an issue. You can practice your own religion, we can practice ours. The respect is there, we are happy and we’re grateful for that peaceful racial and religion freedom that we have here even though majority of them are Muslim Malays.

Do Malaysian women wear veil to cover their face when they go out?

No, not in Malaysia. Mostly these are practiced by the Arabs in the Middle East. When Middle Easterns go to other countries and also when they go back to the Middle East, they will have their veils put up to cover their face when they get out from the house. We are not that extreme. Most of the Malays, the Muslims, they are expected to wear a Tudung, which is a scarf that covers their head. That is expected, but it’s not a compulsory thing. The society is moving towards a more modern practice. We see more women not wearing Tudungs. As long as they have a strong religion, practice inside their heart, and they are not doing any of the wrong doings, then that is okay for them. This is just clothing. Some of the younger generations they have started to change. Women can have short hair.

Did you have any role model growing up?

The person that I look up to, for local, it would be few persons. One of them is our Prime Minister, Mahathir Mohamad, who is on his second time being a prime minister at the age of 92. Many people say that at his age, he should retire. He shouldn’t be coming back to the politics, but he stood up. He was reelected again to become the prime minister because of his persistency, his wisdom. People followed and respected him for the vision that he has, for the work that he has done, and his intention to improve the country even though his days are numbered.

What I mean is your role model like your mom, your dad or any person that you admire and you want to be like.

Uncompromised Performance: The role models that I look up to, it is more to their vision of helping the nation and wanting to impact and change the society.

Not so much from my family members, but more towards Marisa Peer, my mentor herself. I don’t really have a specific role model to look up to. Growing up in a family with a lot of responsibilities that is being given as the eldest of the family, more towards fulfilling the responsibilities. Looking after the family, and delivering a performance that is going to be followed by my siblings. That is how we grow up. It is not until when I was in the university and when I was working, that I started to look up at leaders. Most of the time leaders from the United States and London. Marisa Peer is one of them because she has a great mission. The role models that I look up to, at this age in my life, it is more towards their vision of helping the nation, the society, wanting to impact and make changes to the world and to the society as well. No matter what happens, no matter what the challenges and struggles are ahead of them, they are always persistent in whatever they do. That is something which I look up to in all the leaders and role models. Not specific to one person, but these are the traits that I look up to in all the role models that I am learning from.

You mentioned that you know multiple languages, how many languages did you learn from high school?

Malay language is the primary language when we are in school. English is an international language that we also learned. The third language that we master that is our mother tongue, which is Mandarin. Aside from these three languages, we also speak Cantonese and understand a little bit on other languages such as Hakka and Hokkien. There are four languages that I speak and write.

For people who are not Chinese, they would know a minimum two languages?

Yes.

Are they also fluent in English?

Most of them, yes. When you want to master certain languages, you’re expected to speak. If you don’t speak on it, then you’re not so much fluent. Most of the Malays they choose to still speak in Malay, they rarely speak in English. It’s not as fluent as the rest of the people. Not unless they start practicing and start using it.

Did they learn it in high school?

Yes, since primary school to high school.

What do you think is the impact in the country by having multiple languages?

The impact is that we will be able to speak in many languages. It gives us another edge when we expand our business elsewhere, whether it is in China, Southeast Asia, or the West. We do not have that language barrier. Many countries limit themselves into the local language. There’s a rare chance or very little opportunity for them to be able to even expand their business overseas. Even when there is an opportunity that come knocking at their doorsteps. When you have a tourist that comes here for a business, when they want to buy something and you can’t communicate in English, that itself is already a barrier for their business and their income receiving point. There is a challenge when they can master English as an international language, at least to be able to grow themselves everywhere.

As a traveler from America, I can go to Malaysia, and not be afraid? Can I ask for directions and other things and they will understand English?

Everyone understands. They can speak English. If you travel over here, you’ll find that this place is very easy for you to go everywhere. Even the drivers, they understand English. They will use broken English to communicate with you if they are not fluent, but they understand you perfectly well.

Malaysia also has a high rate of suicide and it started at a very young age.

We are looking at not just Malaysia but over in Asia, especially in Japan. The suicide rate is definitely moving up and also the age group. We used to see people suiciding probably in their 30s, 40s, the mid-life. After twenty years, we are looking at suicide happening at teenager rates. Some of them even as young as twelve years old or eleven years old. They start having suicidal thoughts and attempt suicide. Some of them even kill themselves, whether it is in school, whether it is at home. It is very alarming to have this kind of things happening at such a young age.

What do you think is the reason that it happens at a young age?

That could happen for a few reasons. One is because they find that there is no purpose or no hope in their life. This main thing is highly likely because they find that they’re not good enough or they’re not wanted or they do not belong to this world. That is because of the environment that they grew up with or the incidents that they were exposed in that makes them feel so inadequate, no purpose, meaningless to live this life. They want to end all the suffering and the pain that they feel. In Asia and especially in Japan, I think it is also because of the expectations that is being levied to them as the competition is very stiff over in Asia. Everyone wants to be the best. Once they are unable to be at their best, that’s where they feel inadequate, that they don’t deserve a place, or they don’t belong to this society or the group that they want to belong to. They’ll start having all these negative thoughts in their head and that’s where it will start to spiral. Having all this negativity in their lives, they’ll end up having suicidal thoughts, killing themselves, and all these alarming incidents.

Did it happen to you?

Uncompromised Performance: Most of the employees and the strong corporate ladies that we see are very strong from the external sight, but this is merely part of the responsibility or image that they have to carry.

I once had that thought. We all do not realize when the impact comes to us. We are so busy with our routines, of fulfilling the responsibility whether as a child, as an employee or as a staff, or as a partner or spouse. As we go along fulfilling all these responsibilities, we neglect the part that we need to look after our mind and emotions. Most of the time where we fulfill all these responsibilities, we are giving a lot, we sacrifice a lot. Most of it is, we are required to, it’s like a responsibility, it’s not so much of what we wanted to do truly. When the heart and the mind have a conflict, that’s where the emotion starts to shake. We don’t realize until we start to feel really sad and depressed and start breaking down for no apparent reasons. We just feel the heart is so heavy, the depression comes in. Most of the employees and the strong corporate ladies that we see, very strong from the external side but you can see that this is merely part of the responsibility or image that they have to carry. As the leader of the company or the leader in the family, they have to show all these things so they have to appear to be strong.

They’ll feel incapable inside and that they are not doing enough, that’s where they’ll start to break. That happened to me as well. When the depression set in, I had to look for psychiatrists and psychologists. I was taking antidepressants for 12 years, it doesn’t help. The dosage continues to go up despite me trying to destress, trying to take breaks, it just won’t go away. I couldn’t understand at that point of time, why do I have to keep having this feeling? I want to get out from this feeling and all these negative feelings that is crippling and affecting me. Not only my health, but I couldn’t think straight in my decision making. It’s crippling when you talk about depression, anxiety and all these suicide thoughts. To an extent, I don’t see myself really helping in whether it is in the family, at work or in whatever I do. I find that there’s no purpose for me to continue to live in this world or contribute, I just want to end it. That’s what I experienced myself.

What was the turning point in your life that give you the power to break out of that cultural boundary and start to live your life?

When I went to London for a break, that was unplanned. I came across this program called Uncompromised Life led by Marisa Peer. When I enrolled in that, I learned that we can change our state of mind very easily and we absolutely have the choice to get out from the situation that we have. It is not the end of the world when we are stuck in a certain situation and we can get ourselves out of it. It’s just a matter of how badly you want to get out from the situation. When I got into this course, it starts to change the way that my mind works. Instead of looking at the negative side of things, I start to shift from negative to positive state of mind.

When I used to look at things in a negative manner, “I don’t serve a purpose, there’s no meaning, I can’t handle this. I’m stuck,” I have what I want. To look at a positive side of things, to be grateful for the things that I have. For example, that I can make a difference, I can choose to do things I want to do in a different way to get outcome that I want and work for the changes. When I walk through the journey I realized that, we can definitely make the change and I can go after what I want. I also started to understand where my depression and anxiety comes from. It’s not just from what I was exposed to in the adult life, but it is also much more about how I interpret life as a kid. When I look at an adult and I don’t get the love that I want from my parents. This goes back to my childhood. As a Chinese family, most of the time during our generation, the parents expect a boy. They will shower the attention, care, and love towards the boy more than the daughters. Being the eldest and having a younger brother, you see the parents giving him so much attention, love, and care and you don’t get it. You start to feel like, “Is it because I’m not doing good enough, am I not a good daughter?”

You start to look at what your younger brother is doing, probably it’s because of him excelling in studies better than myself. I started to push myself a little bit harder in terms of education and I moved myself from doing fairly average in the school to being the top 10 in school, in the end, being the top three in school. That doesn’t change anything. The feeling of not being good enough, not worthy of the love, care, and attention from the parents. It starts to sip in back then. As you grow up, as you want more love and attention from the people around you, from your colleagues, from your friends, from your spouse, from your partners, and you’re not getting that. That’s where it continues to build up, that feeling of not being worthy enough and not being good enough. That’s the main reason why we have depression now in the society, many times, it happens everywhere.

What do you mean by create the greatest strength by uncompromised performance?

When we have our negative blocks in our head when we grow up. For example, one of my clients who grew up in a poor family environment, he wants to play and be part of the squash team in the school. The requirement is that he must have a squash racket. Since the family cannot afford to have this squash racket, he told himself, “That’s fine. I don’t need to be in the squash team. I don’t want to be in the squash team.” Over the years, whenever he has something that he wants to achieve, but because of the environment that he was in at a point of time, he couldn’t achieve it. He comforted himself by saying, “I don’t need things that I want to.” Over time, you tell yourself over and over again.

When you are fully grown and you want to achieve something whether it is a performance, in your business or in your career and you tell yourself, “I want to become a manager or I want to become a CEO or I want to become an entrepreneur that hits $100 million a year.” You tell yourself you want to, but because your subconscious mind over and over again for the last 30 years, 40 years, you have been telling yourself that, “I want something but I don’t need it. I can do with whatever that I have.” The subconscious mind is not supporting you in moving forward through your direction. Whatever decisions that you make moving forward, it is going to drag you backwards instead of moving forward. That is a block in the subconscious mind that is going to hinder our performance. When we look into our mindset and our subconscious mind, we know and we realized that we picked up all these negative traits or blocks. We tweak it back and we help the clients to understand that things have changed, the settings have changed.

He or she is now in charge of his own life, that he can make the changes. We empower the clients to make the changes. They see the direction, strategy, and opportunities moving towards the achievement, the target, the goal that they’re after. We talk about releasing the greatest strength in them to achieve an uncompromised performance. Everything is in their head, they don’t realize that over the years they have been telling themselves negative messages or negative interpretations about themselves. About the things that they want to achieve, about the willingness of themselves to achieve what they want, that is not helping them move forward in their life.

You’re a therapist too. What are you specializing in?

I specialize in doing Rapid Transformational Therapy, which helps clients to unveil and unlock all these negative messages or blocks in their subconscious level. I am a clinical hypnotherapist by profession defined by the Marisa Peer School, we learned that normal hypnotherapists, which requires probably six to eight sessions to handle an issue, we handle an issue within three sessions. Most of my clients, I handle them within one or two sessions and that’s it. That’s why it’s called Rapid Transformational. Whether it is in areas of removing the limiting beliefs that they have, overcoming their fears, overcoming the anxiety or depression or even certain behavioral issues like bad temper or bad habits. We help our clients to achieve that easily and very quick.

This is through hypnotism?

Uncompromised Performance: When we are so relaxed, that’s where we make the changes.

We use hypnotherapy and using hypnosis to help the clients relax so that their mental state is able to focus on one particular thing that we want to address on. When the client is able to have that full concentration in a relaxed state, we can focus and address that particular issue without all these negative sounds in their head. When we are so relaxed, that’s where we make the changes and we help our clients to see from a different perspective.

Sometimes people get confused between the therapist and a coach, you are doing both. Who do you see as a coach and who do you see as a therapist when you put on that role?

I work as a therapist when a client who wants to solve an issue or a challenge or overcoming certain bad behaviors or traits. I become a coach when a client wants to move forward after addressing the current issues that they have. Their niche strategies or they need a direction on how to achieve what they want to achieve. They need advice or direction or strategy into moving forward. We have a lot of coaches in the market that provide strategy, advice, directions, and assistance in moving you forward to get what you want. Without us addressing the negative voice in our head, the feeling of, “I’m not good enough. I don’t deserve that kind of income. I couldn’t charge this amount.” The sound in their head that I couldn’t do this, all this is going to deter their success moving forward. I have a niche whereby I am able to help them to overcome the mindset as a therapist. That itself helps my clients to be able to reach a success rate very fast.

When you remove all these negative beliefs in their head, they don’t have all this self-doubt, self-procrastination, self-sabotage that keeps them away from success that they want to go to. Sometimes when we want success, we also tell ourselves if we delay certain things, we can wait on this task, “Wait until I’m more prepared. I’m not fully prepared.” We procrastinate, “This one can wait. I don’t need to do this first. Let me do that one first.” We are not aligned because the subconscious mind is creating all these sorts of excuses or reasons for us not to move forward because we have that limiting beliefs in our subconscious mind. When we address that part and we remove the negative beliefs, that person will not have all this procrastination issues or self-sabotage issues. What they’ll see is only opportunities approaching and they have to do something to move ahead. Go grab it and move forward with it. I come in as a therapist and a coach to help my clients get what they want.

In Malaysia, when people go to see a therapist, does the insurance cover that fee?

Not at this moment because unlike in the United States or London, mental health is definitely covered by insurance. In Malaysia and over in Asia Pacific, this area of mental health is definitely far from being acknowledged. Over here, people are still looking at the mainstream medical. They’re only looking at their physical health. We create a lot more awareness in terms of how important it is about the mental and emotional health-being for the people in this region. That is also the reason why people are not speaking up. It is a taboo when they talk about depression or anxiety, people are not willing to open up that this is the feeling that they have. They are not willing to seek professional help, rather they will quietly go and seek professional help that gives them the medicine. It’s not really helping them in recovery. You have to have a movement for this, for the community, society. Especially for the population over in Asia Pacific, to know how important it is to have a healthy mental and emotional state equally or, if not as important, at least to be an equal importance of their physical health.

You know when they have a scar on their physical body, you can see the cut, you can see it’s bleeding and you’re doing something, you would want to stop the bleeding. When we have our mental health issue, or heavy anxiety, and depression or fear, it’s like having a cut in our mind and our heart. We can’t see with our physical eyes, we put it aside. Over the years when the bleeding continues in our heart and our mind, it leads to a very severe condition. Oftentimes, it’s a little bit too late when they want to come for assistance. That shouldn’t be happening.

When people ask me what I do, I say, “I’m a coach. I am a life and relationship coach. I can help you create a life that you want.” The first thing they will ask is, “Is this covered by insurance?” I say, “No.” In the coaching profession, it’s not mental disabilities, therefore the insurance doesn’t cover that. It’s not a disease or anything. I think that stops a lot of people who I think could use the help. They get stuck with their life, stuck with that relationship moving forward, and they are not happy. They stay where they are.

There are two perspectives to look at it. One is that, in terms of the coverage from the insurance, being a coach, at this moment it’s not being covered. It’s definitely far from being covered by the insurance, but at least some of the therapists over in the States or over in London, it is covered by insurance. For going through all this, this is being recognized as one of the complementary and natural health techniques to help person recover. It is being recognized by some of the insurance coverage through the Western side, coaching is far from it.

Another perspective to it is that the clients or the people who have to realize that even though it’s not covered by the insurance, it is an investment rather than a cost for them. To invest in themselves, to move forward in their lives is not a cost by itself. Whatever they do for this therapy or even for the coaching, it is going to help them not just recover but they are going to get back the investment in multiple times full than what they actually invest in. That is also another part of awareness that we’ll need to create for the people to understand that it’s not about the cost, it’s not about an expenditure, it is about an investment for their own well-being moving forward. Have them able to see how life is going to be if they are able to overcome all these challenges or all this negative chatterbox in their head or the feeling of to be on top of everything. If they can see the value in the future, if they think of this as an investment, if they spend on themselves, that can actually help the people to make up a better decision. Rather than say, “It is not covered by insurance. That’s why I’m not doing this.”

What does the word “power” mean to you?

Uncompromised Performance: Power is something that people thought that we go after but is actually in our own hands at all times.

Power to me means freedom. The freedom that we all have the choice to make. Power is something that people thought that we go after but is actually in our own hands at all times. It’s a matter of whether the person is aware that he has a choice to make rather than to surrender that power and choice for other people to make that decision on their own behalf. The sad thing is that I often see this in a lot of women. They surrender their power to their spouse or their partner. They can do something about their life, but then say, “I can’t because my husband wouldn’t allow me to, or my partner will be unhappy if I do this. If I go into the corporate and work, if I go back to work or if I ventured into business, my partner will be very unhappy.” They surrender their own power to the spouse, which I find sad because this is your own life.

Even though you have a spouse or a partner, they are supposed to be happy for you if you achieve something, not the bad things that you want to do and you go ahead. If you’re going forward for something which is better for everyone, they should get the mutual respect and support from their partner. They should make the decisions for themselves, what kind of life would they want to live, what kind of dreams that they want to fulfill. They always have that power in their hands to make that happen. They have to realize that it is always in our own hands.

What makes you feel at peace?

I feel peace whenever I see people able to transform beautifully and seeing life change. I’m grateful with the things that I have, the people that I am with blessed with around me, for the work that I do. I find peace in all these things that I have and the power to change people’s lives.

What are you most proud of? 

I am most proud of the things that I have gone through in my life. For me to be able to realize that I can share my message and I am able to help a lot of people who is struggling as what I had in the past. I’m proud that I’m able to share so that they realize that they can be free, they can be different, and that can make changes in their life as well. This is something that I am truly proud of.

What is your legacy?

My legacy is to be recognized as a transformative person. A person who is relentlessly sharing and creating awareness of the mental and emotional well-being. That everyone can make a choice. They do have an option. They do have choices and they do have the power to make changes. That is something that I am building on as a person who is leading on transformation and positive changes in the society as well as the region. Bringing the best out of individuals.

If our readers want to learn more about you and your service, where do you want them to go?

They can reach out to me through my website, which is www.InspiredLifeInternational.com. They can also drop an email to me, which is at [email protected]. They can also look up for my Facebook page, @AngelineYeeGarYan.

I hope you enjoy this interview. For more information and for the discussion about different topics, please join us at @AsianWomenOfPowerPodcast Facebook group or the Asian Women of Power LinkedIn group. We want to hear from you. This is Kimchi Chow. Until next time, live life loud.

Links Mentioned:

• Angeline Yee
• Marisa Peer
• Uncompromised Life
• Marisa Peer School
• www.InspiredLifeInternational.com
• [email protected]
• @AngelineYeeGarYan – Facebook
• @AsianWomenOfPowerPodcast Facebook group
• Asian Women of Power LinkedIn group

Episode Quotes

"When we compete and make ourselves stronger and perform better, we actually make ourselves much greater."

"The suicide rate is moving up and also the age group."

"The feeling of not being worthy and not being good enough is the main reason why we have depression now in the society."

"To invest in yourself, to move forward in your life is not a cost by itself."

"Everyone can make a choice. You do have an option and the power to make changes"

About Angeline Yee

The 1 and only Certified Rapid Transformational Therapist and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist from Marisa Peer School in Asia, Angeline’s vision is to bring positive changes to the society, especially women – empowering clients to overcome their physical, emotional and mental barriers towards a positive and meaningful Uncompromised Life, delivering Uncompromised Performance.

Angeline has with her more than 16 successful years of solid mentoring and coaching experiences, building exceptional high performance teams in her corporate engagements. Some of her personal career breakthroughs include being the national youngest Certified Mall Manager (CMM) and national youngest female youngest CMM, the 1st and only Malaysian who obtained International Council of Shopping Centres (ICSC) John T. Riordan Scholarship Award, the youngest middle management in various employments and the youngest senior leadership member with national top asset management company with other numerous record achievements.
Given the opportunity to lead a team of 3 staff on her 1st career upon graduating Bachelors of Commerce & Management (Accounting) from Lincoln University New Zealand, Angeline since then has mentored, transformed and produced more than 70 staff to their better-self. Despite her young age, her passionate purpose in eyeing for breakthrough performance opportunities and her creativity to transform her team into a big win, made her the “Secret Weapon for Happy, Productive Teams”.
Leaving her 6-figure career, Angeline breaths new hope to the society as she utilises a magical blend of her coaching expertise with the most unconventional hypnotherapy to set lasting, profound, positive, new neuro-paths; helping individuals to reach their dream. Her greatest values – dedication, integrity and devotion stand second to none. She is attached to the International Council of Psychotherapist (ICP) London, the General Hypnotherapy Register (GHR) UK and accredited by the honourable Complimentary and Natural Health Council (CNHC) UK. Her existing clients including corporates and individuals : TV personalities, movie producers, models, state and national athletes, senior management down to 6 years old children on various life issues and challenges.
www.InspiredLifeInternational.com
Email : [email protected]